Proud To Be An American?

My daughter had just received her Certificate of U.S. Citizenship, and as we walked down the sidewalk to take this historic photo, I wanted to get a sense of whether she was feeling the magnitude of the moment:

Dad: So, how does it feel to be an American?

Daughter: Okay, but I'm cold....

Dad: Do you see those people (immigrants standing in long line)? They are spending every penny they have to try to get permission to just work in America. Do you know what it means to live in the greatest country in the world?

Daughter: I'm cold.....


Perhaps a visit to the White House would stir up some excitement? I told her that she would remember this day as being special when she brought her grandkids to the same spot fifty years from now. She did manage a smile when I took her picture, but it never ceases to amaze me how ungrateful my daughters can be. From what I've heard from other parents, this is very common. They just don't get it....yet.

Little does she know that her tour of battlegrounds, museums and other historic sites is just beginning! Later on I'll tell her about our family's heroes who fought in all of our nation's conflicts to preserve the way of life she now enjoys.

I hope that some day she will appreciate the fact that her cousin was the first man to make it over the bluffs at Omaha Beach on D-Day, and that her country is the world's oldest democracy, where the principle of personal freedom and individual responsibility still makes America the beacon of hope for millions. If Anastasia wants to, she can walk right up to the gate of the White House and peacefully protest, as thousands of Americans do every year (as compared to Russia).
So, let me say it for her, and for the thousands of other internationally adopted children who now call America home:

GOD BLESS AMERICA!

Sibling Hatred

"The girls" have been apart of our lives now for almost two years. This picture was taken on their first night they visited us during a Christmas hosting trip in 2005. We've always thought of "them" together, but as we've learned in the past four-and-a-half months, they are completely different people with completely different needs and personalities.

We are pleased with the progress they've made, but there have been many surprises and unexpected challenges. The biggest one being the bitterness that has developed between them. They have deep resentment for each other and it makes things very difficult around the house.

We've postponed counseling because of the communication problems, but perhaps it's time to take action because our intervention doesn't seem to be helping much in this department.

Adding to the frustration is that they seem to be incapable of expressing their feelings at more than a surface level. Getting them to answer any sort of open-ended question such as "How do you feel about....." results in a shrug.

I guess this makes sense because they've never had anyone care about how they felt. Certainly they feel something, but they have a hard time identifying it. At first, I thought it was just an issue of them not trusting us with their feelings, but I'm beginning to think that it is much deeper and darker than that.

We love our daughters and are actually enjoying them very much as individuals. But the contempt they have for each other is troubling and only appears to be getting worse.

I pray for wisdom about how to handle this situation.