Sensory Integration Disorder

This is perhaps the most personal thing I've ever posted because it's very hard for me to write about things we struggle with. Because blogging is so public, there are things you just don't talk talk about here. But one of things I love about the adoption blogging community is that it is so encouraging and supportive, and it is in that spirit I am sharing our experience with this baffling topic.

If you are adopting a child from Eastern Europe, I urge you to educate yourself about Sensory Integration Disorder. This is something our precious son has, as do most children who were "cribbed" for long periods of time without nurturning or stimulation of any kind. It is also common to children who were born prematurely and were incubated. I don't think either one of our older adopted children have this problem, as they did not go to the orphanage until age five.



Earlier this year, Christian's Montessori teacher sugggested we have him tested for this. We quickly ordered books she suggested such as The Out of Sync Child, and instantly realized that there was a name for some of Christian's peculiar behavior.



I mention this being so personal because after learning about this, I knew that I had not been the great parent I thought I was. What I thought was disobedience many times was not. He does not like to wear short sleeve shirts, or shorts, even when it's 100 degrees outside. He would much rather sweat.



At six years old, he is still afraid to ride a bicyle, or even sit on his tractor. Instead, he pushes his tractor all over the yard, but if I suggest he rides, he becomes frantic with fear.

He still tries to find ways to stimulate himself, just as he rocked himself in his crib five years ago. The funny position he's in while watching TV is an example of that. There are many, many other symptoms and odd behaviors associated with Sensory Integration Disorder. Please read about it now, even if you feel certain that your adopted child is OK. Christian sees an occupational therapist weekly, and we are much relieved that we finally have some tools to use in helping our sweet boy. Also be advised that this is something many teachers, doctors and therapists are not aware of. It gets misdiagnosed all the time as ADHD, Oppositional Defiant Disorder, or even autism.


Also a word to Christian parents who rightly want to raise their children "Biblically." I've read Dobson's book about raising a strong willed child, and Ted Tripp's "Shepherdering A Child's Heart." Both good books, but I must say that I failed my son badly by using the Dobson/Tripp discipline model for Christian for more than four years.



These guys are big on spanking and make a sound Biblical case for it. But spanking a child with Sensory Integration Disorder, who is screaming because he doesn't want to put on a short sleeve shirt is counter productive to say the least. He or she is not being disobedient! Please read about this and you'll understand.



When I learned that many kids with this don't like to wear short sleeves, I cried. I had spanked Christian many times when he refused to wear short sleeves because I thought he was being disobedient. I was wrong and I'm afraid I did much harm. I am a professing Christian believer, but I warn you that you will get alot of unsolicited and bad advice from well meaning Christians on how to discipline your adopted child. My advice is to throw out Dobson and Tripp, and learn about this very real affliction.

We are now moving forward, and optimistic that we can help Christian to thrive in this broken and disordered world. Now that we know about this, we are much better equipped to do that.