Should Santa Get The Boot?

Santa Claus came to our house this year, or at least that's what we told our youngest. Is there a problem with this? Christian writer Frederica Mathewes-Green says it's a big problem and that we should give him the boot!

First, it's a big fat lie. What kind of an example are you setting here? How stupid are your kids going to feel when they realize they fell for this? What else of what you taught them are they going to doubt? Your kids should know that your word is always good and that they can rely on it without question every day of their lives.

Second, the Santa myth teaches kids ingratitude. You want your older children never to acknowledge your gifts? Enjoy the idea of never getting a thank-you note or any thoughtfulness in return? Santa-talk is a good way to start them on that path. They learn that goodies just magically appear and don't cost anybody anything. Their role in life is just to open packages and enjoy.

It also teaches greed. We may say piously that we want our children to develop just and generous virtues, but filling them with images of a toy-wielding potentate with a lifetime pass on eToys will knock all that flatter than Kansas.

Read the entire column here.

As much as we focused on the "true meaning of Christmas" this year, I'm sure my six year old son was much more impressed by Santa than the incarnation. I don't want to deprive him of these cherished childhood memories, but I'm inclined to rethink Santa in the years ahead.

What do you think?

In With The New!

Building our family for the past six months has been such a blur that we've seldom taken the time to get out and enjoy the natural beauty of our hometown. The James River runs right through the middle of Richmond and features what has to be one of the premiere urban retreats in the country.

The River's most visited destination is Belle Isle, which is accessed by a suspension bridge. In a matter of minutes, you can leave all the hustle and bustle behind, and be transported to a place of rare peace, where the only sound you hear are the rapids rushing through the rocks.

This island was an open-air prison in the Civil War, where thousands of Union prisoners of war died of disease, exposure and starvation. Visiting here is always a moving experience.

As I watched our children enjoying the beauty of God's creation, it occured to me how important it is to spend time outdoors as a family. Is it any wonder that the more urbanized our culture becomes, and the more time we spend indoors, the more agnostic we become?

I read about a fascinating study where kids with ADHD were treated by simply spending time outdoors and the results were overwhelmingly positive in reducing ADHD symptoms. I am diagnosed with ADHD myself and have found that outdoor therapy works wonders, even if it's just taking a walk. CS Lewis and John Adams were both big believers in daily walks, and I mean long ones! Lewis prayed every day during his "peregrinations." I just don't think God intended for us to sit in front of computer screens and TV's all day. One of my goals for the New Year will be more outdoor activities with my children. And the best part is, it's free!

I've never seen our daughters happier. Anastasia is the only shy person in our family, but she is asserting herself as the conscientious, older daughter.

It's hard to believe that this is the same girl who rode in the baby seat of the grocery cart last summer! Galyna can still be a bit rowdy at times, but she is fast becoming a lovely young lady.

I am most grateful for my beautiful, amazing wife. Dana is the most "can-do" person I've ever met. She meets every challenge with optimism and faithful perseverance.

We've got some big decisions ahead of us, but as I think about 2008, I do so with a profound sense of gratitude and hopefulness. Thanks to all of you who've given us so much encouragement during this unforgettable year. May God pour out his love and mercy on you in the New Year.

An Unforgettable Christmas

Our first Christmas together as a family was just about perfect. Our children all exchanged meaningful gifts with each other and demonstrated a loving and grateful spirit.

Anastasia knitted beautiful scarfs for the whole family!

I'll never forget the look on Christian's face when he saw that Santa had granted his request for a Polar Express electric train!


This has been a wonderful week with many sweet moments shared by all. We give thanks to God for every blessing.

Christmas At Home

One of the things I love about our daughters, and that we hope to preserve, is how content they are with simple things. They will sit down and draw, paint, or knit for hours. And although these shots capture them watching a movie, they don't have to be entertained. As we approach the six month mark of our time together as a family, it's easy to focus on how frenetic our lives have become. But as I saw them sitting by the fire with their mom, enjoying a movie while knitting Christmas gifts, I realized how important it is to give thanks for how good things are.

We are all on vacation now, and anticipating Christmas like never before. The girls love Christmas music and we play it throughout the day. By the way, our favorites are Moya Brennan's "An Irish Christmas," and Aimee Mann's "One More Drifter In The Snow."

Brennan's rendition of Christina Rosetti's poem "In The Bleak Midwinter" has to be one of the most sublime things I've ever heard. The entire disc captures the devotional spirit of Christmas perfectly and beautifully, while Mann's CD is more playful at times, but also quite soulful.

And, I must be honest and mention that "Christmas With The Chipmunks" is also a household favorite, but be careful, because if heard more than three times in one day, it can lead to insanity!

Christian is so amped up, he can hardly go to sleep at night. Rumor has it that Santa is considering a Polar Express electric train set, which has father and son counting the days!

Vika Comes Home!

Vika has a family! This shot with our Anastasia was taken Monday night, just an hour or so after Vika made her triumphant arrival at Washington Dulles Airport. Vika had been to America on two Frontier Horizon hosting trips in recent years, but she had aged out of the orphanage and was too old to be adopted. The odds of her ever being able to get a visa to study English were not good, but thanks to the relentless efforts of Frontier Horizon, and Vika's new family, her Christmas wish has come true!

Vika and her new mom (for all practical purposes). Ann is a wonderful lady, who I began corresponding with via email two years ago, as we both prepared to host orphans from Ukraine. She and her husband have four children already (one adopted from Ukraine), so Vika joins a very big family with a very big heart. She will attend community college ESL courses two days per week, and spend time with Ann at her veterinarian office the rest of the time. So, she will be learning some very valuable skills while learning English. What a joyful Christmas story this is!

This is also a good opportunity to mention what a special person Ann has been to our family. While we were exchanging emails two years ago, I mentioned to her how much I was struggling with the heartbreaking reality that it was time to say goodbye to our beloved, 14 year old Golden Retriever. Reilly's hips were shot, he was having seizures, and I was nursing him around the clock. I knew it was past time to put him down, but just did not have the courage to do it. Ann revealed to me that she was a vet. She explained what he was going through, and it was her loving encouragement that finally gave me the strength to give him a peaceful, gentle, and merciful end.

So, welcome Vika, and God Bless you Ann!

About Christmas Cards

A recent posting on the excellent blog of Touchstone Magazine has generated some lively discussion in our home. On the subject of Christmas cards, Marci Segelstein writes:

"In a few days, my mantlepiece will be filled, not with reminders of the gospel story of Jesus’s birth, but with professional photos of children or entire families adorning cards with inoffensive messages like “Peace and Joy.” In my neck of the woods, there seems to be a little competition going for whose children can pose the best for these annual mailings. Frankly, I don’t care. And I have a little reality check for the church-going believers out there who send these photo cards: Christmas isn’t about your lovely, smiling children or your beautifully posed family. It’s about the Son of God taking human form to save your souls. Maybe putting Christ back into Christmas starts at home."

OUCH! As you can see, our card features our "lovely, smiling children." But does she make an important point? Christians complain every year about how secularized the Christmas season has become, but are we not contributing to it by focusing on ourselves?

You can read the entire post here. Your thoughts?

A Lifeline for Teenage Orphans

We just received a new calendar from Universal Aid for Children, featuring some beautiful and heartbreaking art by two young ladies who have aged out of the orphanage system in Ukraine.

The adoption blogworld celebrates the miracle of our adoptions, and anticipates coming adoptions, but the sad fact is that statistically, very few of Ukraine's 100-thousand orphans will be adopted, and that doesn't count the thousands of "street kids."


The UAC's Orphaned Teen Scholarship Program is a lifeline for dozens of children who are forced to leave the orphanage. Please visit their website to learn more.

The Myth Of Safety and Security

"Our basis for trust is not in safety."

Dr. Jennifer Myhre

The Mhyre family in Bundibugyo, Uganda

I have begun a correspondence with a prospective parent, who is considering adopting an older child from Ukraine. She says, "I find I'm so selfish and want things my own, comfortable way."

Her admission is one most all of us can relate to, and addresses an issue that many Christians are coming to terms with. Why aren't Bible believing Christians doing more for God's most neglected children? This was brought home to me recently when our family attended a concert by Matthew Smith, the young Nashville-based singer/songwriter who is helping produce the amazing Indelible Grace albums.

Smith made a pitch for Compassion International, appealing to a crowd of around 500 to support a vital mission work that sponsors poverty stricken children. The cost is $32 per month and he noted that for most of us that could be accomplished by switching from latte to drip coffee!

A grand total of two people stepped forward to help, and the Compassion volunteer said that two was typical for an event this size. Their booth was set up right next to the CD and T-shirt booth, where hundreds of dollars worth of merchandise was being sold to Christians waiting in long lines.

I am in no position to judge, as I am as selfish as they come. I could sponsor several children monthly on my amazon.com and Starbucks habit alone! But I had to write something because I believe the Holy Spirit has been convicting me in profound ways recently.

Actually, it started two-and-a-half years ago when I attended a Mercy Ministries conference of our denomination. I raised my hand to question a speaker who was talking about inner city ministry. I agreed that it was an admirable thing to actually live in the city and minister relationally to the poor, but confessed that the safety of my family would prevent me from doing it right now.

His answer haunts me to this day: "Our job is not to protect our children. Our job is raise them in the admonition of Christ."

I am stunned by the courage I see from some Christians who are doing exactly that. I came across some of them in Ukraine, and today in church, we learned of a married missionary couple that is facing a terrible trial in a small Ugandan village where a deadly outbreak of the E-Bola virus has already claimed 26 lives.

Burying the dead in Uganda

Most of the mission team has been evacuated, but several members of the medical staff have remained and are currently treating infected patients. Scott and Jennifer Myhre, both doctors and the team's leaders, just sent their four children away, but they have decided to risk their lives by staying to treat and minister to those clinging to life.

In the Myhre's blog, Jennifer observes that "our basis for trust in not in safety." But as our pastor pointed out today, safety takes precedence in most of our lives. If you want to have this view challenged radically, John Piper's book Don't Waste Your Life is a very dangerous read. About safety and the Christian life, Piper notes:

"The way I hope to explode the myth of safety and to disenchant you with the mirage of security is simply to go to the Bible and show that it is right to risk for the cause of Christ, and not to is to waste your life."

Until the late 19th century, evangelical Christians led the way in reaching out to the poor, and Piper is one of a growing number of Christ-centered pastors who are challenging the evangelical church to reclaim the Micah mandate to "Do justice, love mercy and walk humbly with God."

The revelation of the prophet Ezekiel regarding the reason for the destruction of the sinful city of Sodom came as a surprise for me. No, sexual sin was not the primary problem:

"Behold, this was the guilt of your sister Sodom: she and her daughters had pride, excess of food and prosperous ease, but did not aid the poor and needy. (Ezekiel 16:49)."

Part of me is satisfied that I've done my part. We've adopted two teenage girls, and are praised frequently for having done so. But the truth is I can not say that we are living sacrificially. We still have "excess of food and prosperous ease" compared to the way 99 percent of the world lives.

I don't know where the Holy Spirit is leading me and my family. But I do know that I do not have to fear my earthly destination, no matter where it may lead. This is a good time of year to rest in the fact that wherever we are going, Jesus has gone before us.

Christmas Blessings

My recent postings reflect on some of the struggles we've been facing, but as these pictures demonstrate, our daughters are anticipating the Christmas season with much joy. It is shaping up to be a very special one as we celebrate the coming of our Lord and Savior, who has made all this possible, and who more than makes up for all our deficiencies.

It's been a bit rowdy around here the last few days. Christian and Galyna are hilarious together!

From our family to yours, we pray for all God's blessings and a joyful Christmas. Your prayers are needed especially for Oleg and Nataliya, and the Haug family as they complete their adoptions in Ukraine.

Proud To Be An American?

My daughter had just received her Certificate of U.S. Citizenship, and as we walked down the sidewalk to take this historic photo, I wanted to get a sense of whether she was feeling the magnitude of the moment:

Dad: So, how does it feel to be an American?

Daughter: Okay, but I'm cold....

Dad: Do you see those people (immigrants standing in long line)? They are spending every penny they have to try to get permission to just work in America. Do you know what it means to live in the greatest country in the world?

Daughter: I'm cold.....


Perhaps a visit to the White House would stir up some excitement? I told her that she would remember this day as being special when she brought her grandkids to the same spot fifty years from now. She did manage a smile when I took her picture, but it never ceases to amaze me how ungrateful my daughters can be. From what I've heard from other parents, this is very common. They just don't get it....yet.

Little does she know that her tour of battlegrounds, museums and other historic sites is just beginning! Later on I'll tell her about our family's heroes who fought in all of our nation's conflicts to preserve the way of life she now enjoys.

I hope that some day she will appreciate the fact that her cousin was the first man to make it over the bluffs at Omaha Beach on D-Day, and that her country is the world's oldest democracy, where the principle of personal freedom and individual responsibility still makes America the beacon of hope for millions. If Anastasia wants to, she can walk right up to the gate of the White House and peacefully protest, as thousands of Americans do every year (as compared to Russia).
So, let me say it for her, and for the thousands of other internationally adopted children who now call America home:

GOD BLESS AMERICA!