I intended to dedicate an entire post to Summer Camp....but ever since this little girl entered my viewfinder on our first visit, I've been struggling with something. I wasn't trying to shoot her; I knew nothing about her and did not set out to get her picture. In fact, I almost erased it because of the poor framing. But the cold stare she gave me for several seconds after the shot has left me thinking about how the presence of people like me impact these hurting children. They see dozens of Americans every year, running around with their fancy digital cameras, snapping shots of them as if they were a tourist attraction. It's another painful reminder that nobody wants them. (Hopefully, other people aren't as bad as I am about this. I take alot of pictures wherever I go.)For some, the resentment of those who are "not chosen" is so strong, that they ridicule the kids who are about to be adopted. Yesterday Galya asked us not to spend time at the camp anymore because it is "embarrassing" and makes it difficult for her. Dana saw this herself as a group of boys walked by and yelled in an ugly tone - "Americanitz!" Galya would not admit that they were making fun of her because of Dana's presence, but a small boy next to her confirmed that it was so.
Of course none of us intend to make the pain and rejection these kids feel any worse. Many of them have had close-up pictures taken, in hopes of capturing the heart of some American, Canadian or Italian who sees them on an adoption website. Many have also been crushed after spending time with a family who had a "referral," only to never hear from them again. I know of one precious boy going through that right now.
I don't know who this cute girl is. I want to think that someone is on their way to take her home to her forever family. I hope that I'm wrong about the reasons behind her seemingly angry stare - and that she doesn't really hate me for not choosing her. Nevertheless, I'm going to be much more mindful about how my presence and my actions affect these children when I visit.
9 comments:
Their faces break my heart! They remind me, though, of why I am saving money (like a mad woman) in the hopes of going to get my kiddos!
I ache reading your words. While many children who go through the hosting program will find families, the are countless numbers who can't because of any number of complications. Some of us will see the pain of those who will not leave and never be able to forget them. I think this is why Vinny is so effective in what he does. He understands that ministering to these children isn't simply about getting them adopted. He uses the hosting vehicle to provide for those left behind.
What a heavy burden our children will carry. It is a survivor's burden. What would God have us do for these others?
Hi Jim and Dana,
I wish you could bring her to me.
I would love to have her or any one of those children. I read your blog everyday and fill up with tears. To actually be there is beyond my imagination. I could give a child so much love and attention. I wish Randy and I could come and get one or two. How do you decide? How are you all doing with all of this?
All my love,
Jamie
Jamie,
I don't know you, but I feel compelled to respond to your question...Jim and Dana will too I hope.
When you reach a place in your life where you can't rest - When you reach a place where blog photos or no blog photos you can't get the children out of your mind. And the thought lasts past a season or two. Then begin to think about adoption.
There is nothing so wonderful as having new children in my family but I would not want to talk anyone into adopting.
Sit with the thought. See if it lasts. Listen hard to your spouse's reaction. See what the Lord does to open doors for you. Seek the Lord, not a child. Maybe you will be one of the very fortunate families whom the Lord chooses to prepare for this adventure. If you aren't supposed to adopt, you still will have found the Lord. And, as we all know, there is no one like the Lord.
Jim, you are such a good photographer! You need to be able to add sound and motion...so we can get the REAL picture. :)
Amy-
What profound advice: seek the Lord, not a child.
Psalms 37:3-5
Trust in the LORD and do good;
Dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness.
Delight yourself in the LORD;
And He will give you the desires of your heart.
Commit your way to the LORD,
Trust also in Him, and He will do it.
Jamie -- you and Randy would be great candidates for older child adoption!
I am going to dedicate a post to this later.
Love you .....
Thanks to all of you for your kind comments and words of support. It is amazing how powerful internet fellowship can be!
This is such a sad story, but one that I can understand from the children's perspectives. I hope that Dana was not hurt, but instead feels grateful that you will get your girls home soon. We continue to pray for your quick return with your entire family.
Great post. My wife and I are leaving Monday and have our appointment on Thursday to adopt an unknown 7 - 11 year old girl. For us we are really are looking forward to meeting our new daughter.
Congratulations on your adoption.
Jill and Robb
In your excitement over your girls it would be easy to overlook the plight of the ones you cannot take.
Your sensitivity to them is touching. That photograph is striking.
Post a Comment